I've recently become aware of
the rumor going around the college-age set that UMF is the "lesbian
campus" of the U-Maine system. I don't have a whole lot of
experience with the other campuses, but I have noticed that UMF does
seem to have a rather substantial, or at least visible, lesbian
population. While this is good news for liberal lesbian feminists like
me, the more conservative or perhaps less-experienced new students
arriving this fall might find being around the lesbian crowd a bit
disconcerting. I attribute this reaction to being in the more confining,
conservative atmosphere of high school and to several myths about
lesbians that have been circulating for as long as I can remember. I
remember believing some of these myths when I was in junior high, but
now I find them amusing and sometimes irritating. Here just a few of the
many myths I've run across in my travels, explained and exposed.
3. We want to be men I have no idea where this came from. I don't know any lesbians who want to be men. I know transgendered individuals who are biologically female but who feel like they are male, but that’s another story. Here's my logic on the subject: I am a lesbian because I love women (most of them). I like men but don't feel any strong affinity for them. I do not envy the fact that they have penises. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't know what to do with a penis, as it seems to be something that just hangs around and tends to be the weak spot on the male body. 4. All lesbians have short hair/are butch While there are some women who look more masculine than others, the general lesbian population looks pretty much like the general female population. Some have short hair, some have long, some wear makeup, some don't. This leads us into our next myth, which is 5. You can tell which women are lesbians and which aren't just by looking at them I hate to break it to the masses, but there is no set of signs or mannerisms that identify lesbians to the general public. There are a select few women who are noticeably gay, usually identifiable by the rainbow stickers on their cars or the pink triangles on their lapels, but most of us look like everybody else. Many gay people claim that they can spot other gay people by using a special power called "gaydar," but for the most part there is no way to know for sure. It would be handy for me if there were some way to pick lesbians out of the crowd in order to avoid the embarrassing situation of crushing out on a straight woman, but until we figure out some kind of universal secret handshake, getting to know people and finding out the old-fashioned way (prying) is the only surefire method.
6. Lesbians are women who are just too ugly to attract a man Anne Heche. Need I say more? 7. We can change and be straight if we want to (because it's a choice) Conversely, straight people can become gay if they really want to. Try suggesting this to someone like George W. Bush or Dr. Laura and see what happens. In my opinion, sexual orientation is not a choice any more than height and eye color are. True, some gay people try to mask their orientation and attempt to be straight. Some people wear lifts and tinted contacts, too. Putting anyone into a box based solely on sexual orientation, or skin color, or religion isn't fair. Keep in mind that people are incredibly diverse and have a lot more going for them than any one aspect. I think that all of us should make it our goal this year to make friends with one person who's very different than us (I'’ll be on the lookout for a right wing republican straight male). I'll bet that all of us will find ourselves pleasantly surprised, and be the better for it. |
